Waking Up White by Debby Irving

 "In this society violence against poor people and minority groups is routine.  I remind you that starving a child is violence; suppressing a culture is violence; neglecting schoolchildren is violence; discrimination against a working man is violence; ghetto house is violence; ignoring medical needs is violence; contempt for equality is violence; even a lack of willpower to help humanity is a sick and sinister form of violence".  These are words from Coretta Scott King spoken in 1969, and the more I try to educate myself in the nuances of American culture and racism, the more I realize that my problem has been the lack of willpower to be a voice for change...I have been a bystander.  

Irving does a great job of sharing her story, being raised in a rich upper class family in Winchester, Massachusetts.  She outlines the ways that she fell easily into the socioeconomic privileges her life afforded, with no thought of how others in lesser financial straits coped.  Her family culture taught her that she simply needed to work hard to meet her goals, to help "fix" other people's problems by teaching them to be more like her, to not push back in a hard conversation so that silence became the best solution.  These well ingrained family culture points had to be dismantled at age 50, as she became more aware of her part in allowing racism to prevail.  She found out that people of color do not want white people to "swoop in" and save/fix them, they want the tools to help themselves.  She is learning to bring listening skills to her difficult conversations so that she can hear other voices and cultures, and learn how she might be wrong.  She now understands that for many, working hard cannot get them into the best schools or jobs...because her privilege gave her referrals by prestigious and powerful white people.

This book added different layers to what I have been learning about myself, about how I view my opinions and values as right or normal, about my role as a bystander.  My heart is ready to figure out how to be an ally in this important fight.  May God give me wisdom.